No title

Shivering with anticipation I fear,
I might do something I regret.
Pain on my hand that eeks
down my wrist.
So I’ll chop it off.
Amputate before infection
Spreads.

If I let it,                       If I let it.
God Forbid,
I might die                      I might die.
God Forbid,

But time moves faster than infection and we all need to make a move.
maybe, not all, but I do, I need to make a move soon, but not far and I think I’ve gone and done it anyway.

I’ve shouted a big old get on with it as I leave it up to the old gods of my hometown and find some NEW gods in a far away city.
The furthest I could go without a passport.

I start to thrive, I starved never.
I starved never.
I starved never.

I move with so much gratitude it’s leaking out of my self-inflicted sores.
and melding into the drinking water of my new city…
that doesn’t need a lesson like my old as it seems to get on with it faster
and whether I like it or not,
far beyond my control,
easier to get a grip on and let myself drift on,
and let myself drift on and let myself drift on and let myself drift on
down the river of insolence as I have never starved in my life but wish to wither and hope I don’t die but love the thought of the romanticism of aching
melancholy.

So I commit myself to life and its finer things when I can afford them
&
Let that misery and those regrets ebb and flow with the tide.
As my soul grows into something pure and real which I strive to own
Wholly one day and make it mine
like a selfish hoarder with nothing better to do than to collect
&
steal trinkets.

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It’s about a park ranger

The ranger sits there falling thinking he should put his cards on the table
He waits for the right moment to lie down, he needs to lie down
He makes air out of the water even though he wanted to drown
He breathes in sadly making His chest shudder and swell
He sits lonely thinking Why he resigned himself to this deadly hell
And the snakes begin sliding towards him and falling from the roof
And the wasps, frogs and locusts slip through the cracks in the floorboards and windows
He’s suffocating as the frogs climb over his legs and arms

Reciprocated

Drink it in as time leads it on till we stop acknowledging
Into the moments that fleet for it’s there
And your soul weeps into eternity
for that built up tension you let escalate
And we are, so we are, so we are.
Oomph

And now I’m melting into the sides of every shape
these shapes collide as I slip through the cracks.
And fall flat on a circle.
Lights flicker on and off and on and off.
Oomph

My eyes swelter in the heat
My mind tries to lift itself out of its state.
It’s alright, it’s only fate.
Oomph

Sweet minutes pass by.
Enjoyed by the love of my life.
Oomph

Recklessness devotes itself to me.
Oomph

Take A Walk Son.

Into the bush, we listen…
As the water moves & slowly carves toward the city where we hold our hearts ransom.
And the brown rocks and red dirt get covered and shifted and dispossessed.
Leaves pile up uncertain how long they will be there.
And Movement happens like a classical piece minus the love, minus the emotion.

We breathe life and exhale into this world from the one screeching our names.
And as we move innocently the wind brushes past with force that makes the might trees rumble and your body shiver and quake.
And you examine time as a makeshift answer because society has its problems so each raindrop is a minute that teaches you to move faster until you need to stop and observe your footing and witness mushrooms shaped like orange peels and gumnuts chewed up and flicked casually by the rulers of the skies.

Do you think we make an impact as we step carelessly into a puddle?
Or nip an odd mushroom with our heels as it flourishes on this tough, gritty terrain!
Silence but winds & our footsteps as we make our solemn march home.

Candle and Coal

Candle and Coal

Into blackness these souls drift

you see them and they are so real

you think you can save them but it is impossible

that’s final.

Resonating only with pain and sorrow; it won’t continue.

Our love was a bold statement

it’s now seemingly burning down into a stub like a candle stuck on a table that has only ever been scratched and graffitied on.
Becoming nothingness, meaninglessness.

It is subtle and it creeps and it lets you know it’s there and it’s going to wear you down till you’re fresh again and nothing about it is sudden except the initial shock, accept the initial shock, every day because the shock wears down and eventually you are left with the numbness.

As you know and feel your heart it is continuously colluding with the souls that are drifting, that have fled, that have moved into darkness.

And you are left with your little soul that thrived off the love of a few big souls but now has no fuel to burn its flame and you cry out for something to burn but you are left with a little piece of coal and no hope.

You want to leave as well, and your soul is screaming to drift into the blackness, it has already moved so far over there that you haven’t one really, and it is waiting for you to make that final move, to embrace the new home of its friends.

Another candle is brought just before your candle was to burn out and leave a scorch mark on your derelict table.
You did not make it in time and foolishly you let it burn out.
You curse yourself and curse the fact that this love is now only a mark that will be there always to remind you of how you lost it.

Your piece of coal isn’t alight anymore and you dig through the ashes to find something hot, something real, because you need something to light your new candle with, you burn your hands and search deep amongst the ash and cinder and find another piece of black coal with speckles of red and you reach for the candle and press it against the red, you are patient and blow, hard, and desperately.

The candle catches alight and you melt its base to the wretched table that mocks your mistakes.

You melt the candles’ base right next to the old scorch mark.

An old friend goes out and fells a tree for your sake,
Another friend chops it up.
A new friend gathers kindling and dried leaves and builds it above your little black coal.

A recommendation

Grinning,

I let my teeth bare witness to the aching of this moment.

And hope they show I mean well as I cringe at my own unfortunate state as without a shred of charisma I ooze out hopelesness as I talk to people I care about.

In and deep Im sure it’ll be made better some day.

Have you read A.B Faceys ‘A Fortunate Life’ I recommend it.

Pain as an institution.

Mark my safety on a line between dredge and transparency

Indicate where I’ll be in a year for the wellbeing of dependency

Instigate a moment that will make me worry for a while

End it for the time being and drink the tears of the nile

Produce the openness that we need desperately

Into each second, my friends I will leave

I will be alone and, in a moment, I won’t have a scare.

I will be alone and, in a moment, I won’t be a part of it.

But we can parley often enough for confusion

I will meet you on the edge of destitution.

And we can drink the blood of the committed.

Their screams are worth the bitterness that I swish around my teeth.

And my tongue loves the flavour but my stomach will reject it.

Make us vomit up the mess to a believing few.

And they will lap it up like thirsty dogs.

Easy Mornings

easymornings
Arna Baarts artist @ artofkundalini.com

Thanks to you.
Easy mornings forever.
I’m a mess and you tidy me up.
Shave my face.
Splash it with the water you draw.
Ready, Ready, Ready,
Thanks to you.
Explosive
It shouldn’t be controlled
Easy mornings forever
Thanks to you.

The hook

The hook, the hook.
let it slice and cut and bleed you out.
Everybody is screaming for the hook to enter and rip.
To scream is to bleed and you will.
We all will.
Deep, dark, live, snark.
Sad, open, fairy tales seeding love into your dull life.
lovely height lets you see more of your strife.
Easy, closed, turn around and walk back over those nails you put in those floorboards that you put on the carpet so you would tread carefully.

Link to photo

House of Stairs

Houseofstairs_(Sleator)

It is ready for your entry and you are you, ready for a little world of your very own.

Let it suckle on your life force because it is everything you ever dreamed of.

And you are ready and willing and I know you are tougher than you look.

You are going to take on the world for as long as you humanly can because if for not than a moment when you can you will shred the papers and build your brand new world inside four walls a door and a damn tonne of stairs leading to nowhere